The Threshold Guardian

   While reading Joseph Campbell's The Power of Myth, I was intrigued by the concept of the "threshold guardian."  An obstacle is present right at the beginning of every hero's tale that they must face in order to prove that they are worthy of going on, of even being a hero on a journey.  The threshold guardian could literally be a person who challenges the potential hero to a fight, or it could be anything else standing in the way, such as a physical or emotional obstacle that keeps them from starting their journey of mythic proportions.

   My story's threshold guardian is uncertainty and doubt.  This has been a perpetual problem for me, and as I read about the threshold guardian and thought about how it applied to my own life, I realized that my doubt was what was making it impossible for me to move forward.  Whenever I made a choice or had an idea about what direction I wanted to take my life in(particularly in regards to career), I would begin to think of all the other possible choices I could make or directions I could take, constantly letting my focus drift from idea to idea.  I couldn't shake the gnawing fear that nothing I thought of was perfect enough.  I was stuck in a cycle of dead-ends.

   It has only been in the past few months that I have begun to choose my path  There were periods of doubt, and there was a period of time when I thought I had changed my mind.  But my present direction kept coming back to me.  I kept questioning it, but it kept withstanding the questions.  Finally, I took direct, practical steps to move myself in its direction.  As I took the very first step, doubt hit me and a collection of very random other possible options filled my mind.  But this time, I saw the diversion for what it was, and I let it pass.

   This is an area I will have to continue to overcome, until moving forward feels natural to me.  Even so, I have already come far.   Even to be able to continue on and to feel the peace I now feel, to recognize the tricks my brain plays on me, is amazing progress.  I am learning to accept that nothing is perfect, but to know that's no reason not to make choices.  Plenty of things are imperfectly beautiful.  I am finally overcoming the threshold guardian, and my journey has begun.